Handling the Holidays When You Have An Eating Disorder
by Susan Schulherr, LCSW, originally posted on Alijor’s blog.

(Alijor) The holidays can be a joyful time, generating warmth, connection and fond memories. But, for many, they can as easily represent a hazard to health, happiness and a sense of well–being. If you have an eating disorder you may be especially vulnerable. Common seasonal pitfalls for people with eating disorders include holiday parties (exposure to triggering foods, worries about personal appearance or socializing), family gatherings  (when old wounds, rivalries and tensions surface), loneliness, disappointment and perfectionism. Here are a few strategic ideas for navigating your way to January 2nd successfully:

Plan ahead

Trying to strategize in the heat of the moment is too hard for most of us. Make some decisions ahead of time about how you want to handle challenges, for example, a holiday event. Visualize yourself carrying out each aspect of your plan until you can imagine it comfortably.

Avoid the temptation to diet!

Dieting triggers eating disorder symptoms. If you plan to skip meals the day of a party, fast between events, or start the Lettuce Diet, you’re setting in motion a vicious cycle that’s bound to land you in eating disorder territory.

Focus on your strengths

Obsessing on what you find wrong with your body or personality is a predictable holiday joy–killer. Make a commitment now to refocus your attention on things you like. Do you have great hair? Strong arms? Are you a good dancer? Story–teller? Listener? Focus on your list every time you start fretting about yourself.

Review your assumptions

Be skeptical if you’re tempted to believe loneliness or isolation mean you’re unlovable. They’re more likely to mean you’ve been too scared to connect significantly—something you can work on!

Reach out

Do something pro–active and constructive. It’s likely to shift your emotional state. Host a potluck for other friends and acquaintances whose holiday plans are meager. Volunteer. Take a small holiday offering to your neighbors. Join a choir or small theatre group. There’s a world of other humans out there ready to embrace your efforts.

Be willing to learn how to comfort and soothe yourself

. . . even if part of you is screaming you’re entitled to some comfort from the outside. It has nothing to do with entitlement; you’re entitled to feel better!!

Cultivate self–acceptance

You may not be able to stop self–critical thoughts from popping up. But you can make a choice to send them packing when they do! This is a practice to develop. It recognizes the truth that imperfection doesn’t make you worthless, just human.

Many people with eating disorders will tell you they’d like nothing better than to go into hibernation for the season. But if you’re willing to peek outside the trenches and use the opportunity to practice these important recovery skills, you’ll not only make the current season brighter, you’ll be building resilience for the challenges of the coming year. Happy Holidays!

Susan Schulherr, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist and the author of Eating Disorders for Dummies